So you say you're a good mother???

  

How many times have you asked yourself,"Am I a good mother?" Or how many times have you said, "I'm not a good mother." Well, if you're anything like me, you've said it a couple of times... plus some. Lol. 

Recently, I've been thinking of some of my goals, with one of them being *Do more activities with the kids. I'm a stay at home mom of 3 and I want to take advantage our  free time (it isn't a whole lot). I want to teach my boys more things to get ready for school, but I haven't worked it into our routine just yet. I'm not a crafty person so that hasn't happened yet either. 

I've been talking to some of my mommy friends lately, and it's interesting that we ALL are trying to be better in some area.  All across the board we are comparing ourselves to one another, wishing we were like such and such. Good ol' Facebook does an excellent job of putting people on a platform. So we got Martha Stewart moms, Betty Crocker moms, Jillian Michaels moms and Incredi-Mom, who juggles it all!

 So here's the thing, "It's not always what it seems." The mom that looks put together in a snapshot isn't always put together in real life. I'll be the first to raise my hand. Sometimes (when my kids are behaved & sleeping lol) I write nice things about them on facebook and then as soon as they wake up, all heck breaks loose. Lol. Sometimes it just goes down like that! It's called life. It's inconsistent. We have good days and bad days.

Instead of comparing ourselves to online people, why don't we celebrate one another in what comes natural to them? I'll be the first to admit that I'm not a soft spoken person most of the time, despite what my pictures look like. I have some friends who naturally speak softly to their husbands and kids and it INSPIRES me. It's something I have to put more effort in and Prayer, but just being around certain people motivate me to be better in that area. I constantly have to work on my tone. (Proverbs 15:1)

There are plenty of moms who wish they did better in the kitchen. Health is a priority to me, so it's easier for me to put in the effort. I don't always succeed, because I can't. Life gets crazy sometimes and I have no choice but to serve a quick pizza! But I thank God, I am at home and I'm able to cook for my family and give them healthier alternatives. But, maybe you don't have the time;it's okay. Do what you can with what you have. I wish I was a funner mom (is that a word?) but I'm not...yet. So, instead of keeping looking down on myself, I'll just ask my fun moms for some games or suggestions or look on Pinterest ;) no biggie, I'm not the worst mom ever. We all need to stop condemning ourselves for not being like her or looking like her. There's no standard except Jesus. And He wasn't a mom, so all we can do is our best and not be ashamed to ask for help. I've decided I have to get up each morning and pray with my kids to have a good, safe fun day. And ask God for His grace because I so desperately need it. We never stop growing, and we never arrive. Especially as wife and mother, we'll always be striving towards something. And lately, I've just enjoyed watching friends enjoy their kids and share their great ideas with me. It's beautiful.

So, No you are not a bad mom for not having time to work out or cook! Our lives are all different. We all are traveling on different paths, no need to compare them because we're not racing each other. We've all been given different strengths and gifts. I believe God did this so that we can depend on one another. If we all were good in the same areas, why would we need each other? We wouldn't. So I'm not going to be ashamed that I'm not good at all things. I DO need help from friends. I would like your ideas on how to better. I don't live in a house with a white picket fence around it. I have an apartment and a daily prayer to be better to my kids and husband. I don't want your life, but maybe I do want your patience or your awesome ideas :)



So you say you're a good mother?????
I think you're right.


p.s. As I always say, I'm here to help. If there's something you need, just ask :)

                Love me,

               Love God.

"You shall not covet your neighbor's house, wife,...."

Covet:
1. to desire wrongfully, inordinately, or without due regard for the rights of others: 2. to wish for, especially eagerly

*Covet means "to have a strong desire for." Coveting was not merely an appreciation of something from a distance, but an uncontrolled, inordinate, selfish desire. This tenth command governed an internal matter: the sin of coveting occurred in the mind.....
 **The bible says "Finally, brothers, whatever is true, whatever is noble, whatever is right, whatever is pure, whatever is lovely, whatever is admirable--if anything is excellent or praiseworthy--think about such things." (philippians 4:8)

I've been wanting to write about this 10th commandment for awhile now. Mostly because I, myself have dealt with it. Matter of fact, I think we all have dealt with it before. In this day & age, social media is everything! We all want to be heard, liked, commented on, favorited, followed, & retweeted! The problem with this is that we can only see a glimpse of people's lives. More than not, that glimpse is when we're on top & at our best. Few people post about their miserable lives, unattentive husbands and misbehaved kids! Few. 

   For God to include this in His 10 commandments speaks volumes! And my, my, my how timely is it in our days. Facebook (among others) can be a major blow to anyone's journey to contentment. God says He knew us all before we were in our mother's womb. He has created us for HIS glory meaning He has a purpose for everyone! Which is to love Him, serve Him & help others to do the same. No two people are the same & no two people have the exact same calling! 

That means that my husband & children were called for me and me only. Our joys and our struggles were allowed by God in order to bring forth more purpose in our lives. So with sites like facebook, people are often bombarded with the better aspects of people's lives. All up & down our newsfeed are pictures of beautiful, mannered children, hand in hand couples, devotions to our "perfect" spouses, and awards for having the best mom & dads! At one point, it will cause you to start to wish you had what you see.

I think this is one of the biggest drawbacks to social media. It cause more people to be discontent with their lives. And it will rob you of your joy. It can be the simplest things too. Thoughts like:I want that many friends," "I need more followers," "Why can't my husband praise me more like hers does?" " Lord, I want a ministry like theirs," "why are so many ppl drawn to their posts?" "they have the perfect family!" "If only I have what they have-they're best friends," "she has the perfect body!" "they always hear from God" etc etc! 

Sadly I think God is shaking His head down at us like my dear child I HAVE blessed you beyond measure! I love you-I know the plans I have for you!

In our rough times, we gaze at pictures of smiling couples, job promotion statuses, family vacation albums & we get bitter. We wonder why we're struggling in our pit & they have it better than us. What is wrong with me we often ask. Like I said, I know because I've been there. 

I've felt so low in my life & instead of drawing nearer to God for affirmation I got on Facebook & began to covet other people's lives. I wished I had a ministry, I wished my husband did what hers did, and I wished I wasn't in the place that I was in. In those pity party moments I failed to realize that 1. God is ALWAYS in control 2. My Life race doesn't look like everyone else's and 3. I'm only seeing the good times in everyone's lives!

Nobody's life is perfect & it's hardly ever what it appears to be. People present their best to the world. The times they worked out, ate right, was surprised by hubby, heard from God, prayed all night, got along with family, got promoted, or done cool things with their kids. Few people will actually talk about their failures & disappointments; Loneliness & outrage.

God has purpose in our imperfections. What we may see as a very flawed life, He sees as opportunities. Opportunities for Him to grow & mature us. If He gave us the perfect life, we would run around here thinking we don't need Him. If our marriages were exactly what we wanted & needed all the time we would take our spouse for granted & not value the work it takes to walk together. 

We have to remind ourselves that God knows our heart;He knows intimate things that we do not even know! And therefore, He knows the best ways to bring about character & integrity; Christlikeness. We all have lots to work on. If He allows hard times to fall, then maybe we'll learn to lean on Him more. We'll look to Him more often & find a healthy place of dependency.

I hope this all makes sense. I don't mean to get off track lol. I really just want us to appreciate our beautiful messes as they come. I want us to stop desiring what everyone else has & start appreciating what God has for us. God is the dealer; trust that He did not misdeal! Your friends on facebooks should not be your standard of what a good life looks like. (we all have our good & bad) 

Let me be 1 less person you have to wonder about lol...Don't wish you had my family. God has better for YOU :) When you see my family pictures, remember this: our smiles are just the end result of the labor that went into our family. The smiles are because God has gotten us through some rough, rough times and thank God we can all be smiling together! 

There were lots of tears before there were smiles. I do not take my marriage for granted because at any time we could have walked out.  And please don't wish you looked like me lol, I have many flaws! I say this in love. I work hard for my health, none of it was handed to me. It's an ongoing struggle, but it's mine & I'm overcoming :) 

Instead of coveting, start rejoicing with people. Life is hard for us all. We can all be "on top" & we can all be down low. Don't let Facebook be used to distract you from God's blessings for you.

**The Bible says "Finally, brothers, whatever is true, whatever is noble, whatever is right, whatever is pure, whatever is lovely, whatever is admirable--if anything is excellent or praiseworthy--think about such things."
--->Therefore, you know everyone else's life isn't better than yours. You aren't the worse off, and you're not a victim! Think on those things which are TRUE, which is God Loves you. He created you & He made you wonderful and perfect. You can have Joy through Him. Let YOUR life story (the good, the bad, & the ugly!) be your platform to show off God.

Life goal:  "I am not saying this because I am in need, for I have learned to be content whatever the circumstances. I know what it is to be in need, and I know what it is to have plenty. I have learned the secret of being content in any and every situation, whether well fed or hungry, whether living in plenty or in want." Philippians 4:11,12  

Love me,

Love, God.

Run your Race!!!

We all have a race to run. There are so many things in my life that I have to constantly "achieve." I have to strive towards that Proverbs 31 woman, being a better aunt, friend, mother, wife, daughter etc. etc. Not to mention keep up with my house, children, church and health! All these things make up "my race." Often I feel defeated, too exhausted to go on. Often I find myself right here on this keyboard writing another blog about trying to do better or feel better.

 Sigh plus smile lol. So currently I am 3 months post par tum and I am stuck at a certain weight. Booo. Yea. I had a conversation with myself yesterday about running my race. I will forever be trying to perfect my health & relationships. It's just something I have to do. No excuses, gripes, or complaints. I feel my best when I'm closest to God, eating well & exercising, being patient with my kids (&family). So I have to work (hard) on those things. When ppl say everything good is worth working hard for or anything good takes hard work??? Something like that lol-it's true. The good news is that " I can do all things through him who strengthens me." Phil 4:13. Seriously, I can't keep up with all these things by myself. I'm not that good, not even close. What do we think God is for?? If not to be leaned on, then what? I've had to get over many humps in my 28 years. How can I even be discouraged & think that my Father who created HEAVEN and EARTH can't help me? can't save me? 

It is His very nature to be my strength! It is His perfect Love that casts out my fears. I can be healthy, I can be loving and kind and patient, organized & strong!  All things the scripture says. So why do I feel like I'm running in place on a stupid treadmill???? Maybe because I'm human & imperfect. Maybe because I get weary in well doing. 

Maybe because the moment I cross the finish line will also be the very moment I fall into the arms of Jesus. Meaning, perfection cannot be completed while I'm on this earth. Above all else I just want God to whisper in my ear and tell me "it's ok." It's ok to fail and get back up & start over. And repeat that 5oo more times lol. When Jesus said apart from Him we can do nothing-smh man that's so real. I'm a mess.

 Even this post is out of order! lol. It was inspired from my weight loss project and now I'm just throwing everything in the pit! The best of me KNOWS God loves me and He's not going to leave me. I believe that He's my help, my guide, my strength, my everything. I can do this. I can do it...through JESUS. I was born to run this race and I was born to finish this race!

~Philippians 3:13 says, "I do not consider that I have made it my own. But one thing I do: forgetting what lies behind and straining forward to what lies ahead,  I press on toward the goal for the prize of the upward call of God in Christ Jesus."

Yes Jewel, strain forward!

"I have fought the good fight, I have finished the race, I have kept the faith." 2 Timothy 4:7

Note to self: I am a perfect fit and being a perfect fit does not mean I have to fit right now! It does not mean that I'll always believe I fit either. No, there will be days when I doubt myself and on those days I have to remember that I do indeed fit into what God has called me to be. And not only am I perfect for God's will for me, so are YOU perfect for your ordained will. Smile.

Love me,

Love God.

I am a Perfect Fit

So today marks my first entry on Blogger! I've had sooo much to write, but not enough time. I've finally had to just face the fact that I NEED to write! Not only is it therapeutic for me, but I know God has called me to reach the nations with words. "I am a Perfect Fit" stems from PSALM 139:13 which says, "For you created my inmost being; you knit me together in my mother's womb. I praise you because I am fearfully and wonderfully made; your works are wonderful, I know that full well." 

       Initially A Perfect Fit Menistries started as a ministry catering to our husbands. Saying that we are a perfect fit for them, but 3 years later in my marriage I know that this is bigger than just marriage. I am a perfect fit- yes for my husband, but also for my 3 children, my family, friends, church, and most importantly My Heavenly Father-Jesus Christ! 

I don't know about you, but I have to fight off my own condemnation! So many thoughts of my short comings, failures, guilt, shame-the whole 9 yards. See, but God o God does NOT make mistakes. We were created in HIS image alone, and that means that I AM a perfect Fit for even Him. 

He created me (and you :) He foresaw our whole life & still chose us! He still desired us despite all our faults.
       So this blog is dedicated to my many trials and my many victories! (No, in all these things we are more than conquerors through him who loved us-Romans 8:37) My words are a charge to press through --->, trust Jesus, and BELIEVE that you are A Perfect Fit! Love you lots!

Love me,

Love God.